Composition Rhetoric by Stratton D. Brooks

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Brought suddenly to his feet, Leon stood for some moments uncertain what
to do. He believed that the eyes belonged to snakes which had just crept
out of the river; and he feared that any movement on his part would lead
them to attack him. Having risen to his feet, his eyes were above the
level of the blaze, and he was able in a little while to see more clearly.

He now saw that the snakelike heads belonged to creatures with large oval
bodies, and that, besides the fifty or more which had come up to look at
the fire, there were whole droves of them upon the sandy beach beyond. As
far as he could see on all sides, the bank was covered with them. A
strange sight it was, and most fearful. For his life he could not make out
what it meant, or by what sort of wild animals he was surrounded.

He could see that their bodies were not larger than those of small sheep;
and, from the way in which they glistened in the moonlight, he was sure
they had come out of the river. He called to the Indian guide, who awoke
and started to his feet in alarm. The movement frightened the creatures
round the fire; they rushed to the shore, and were heard plunging by
hundreds into the water.

The Indian's ear caught the sounds, and his eye took in the whole thing at
a glance.

"Turtles," he said.

"Oh," said the lad; "turtles, are they?"

"Yes, master," answered the guide. "I suppose this is one of their great
hatching places. They are going to lay their eggs in the sand."

--Captain Mayne Reid.

Would the preceding incident be interesting if we were told at the
beginning that the boy and the Indian had encamped near a hatching place
of turtles?

2. Not every story that reads like fiction is fact, but the _Brooklyn
Eagle_ assures its readers that the one here quoted is quite true. The man
who told it was for many years an officer of the Chicago, Burlington &
Quincy Railroad Company in Illinois, and had annual passes over all the
important railroads in the country. His duties took him to Springfield,
the state capital, and as he generally went by the Chicago, Alton & St.
Louis road, the conductors on that line knew him so well that they never
asked to see his pass.

"One day I received a telegram summoning me to meet one of the officers of
my company at Aurora the next morning. I had only a short time to catch my
train to Chicago, and in my haste left my passbook behind. I did not find
this out until I reached Chicago, and was about to take the last train for
Aurora that night. Then I saw that the conductor, a man brought over from
the Iowa division, was a stranger, and the fact that I would need my pass
reminded me that I did not have it.

"I told the conductor the situation, but he said he could not carry me on
my mere representation that I had a pass.

"Why, man," said I, "I am an officer of the company, going to Aurora on
company business, and this is the last train that will get me there in
time. You must take me."

"He was polite, but firm. He said he was a new man on this division, and
could not afford to make any mistakes.

"When I saw that he was determined, I rushed off to the telegraph office;
but it was too late to catch anybody authorized to issue passes, so I
settled it in my mind that I must go by carriage, and the prospect of an
all-night ride over bad roads through the dark was anything but inviting.
Indeed, it was so forbidding that I resolved to make one more appeal to
the conductor.

"You simply must take me to Aurora!" I said, with intense earnestness.

"I can't do it," he answered. "But I believe you are what you represent
yourself to be, and I will lend you the money personally. It is only one
dollar and twelve cents."

"Well, sir, you could have knocked me down with the flat side of a
palm-leaf fan. I had more than two thousand dollars in currency in my
pocket, but it had never for an instant occurred to me that I could pay my
fare and ride on that train. I showed the conductor a wad of money that
made his eyes stick out.

"I thought it was funny," said he, "that a man in your position couldn't
raise one dollar and twelve cents. It was that that made me believe you
were playing a trick to see if I would violate the rule."

"The simple truth was, I had ridden everywhere on passes so many years,
that it did not occur to me that I could ride in any other way."

+Oral Composition III.+[Footnote: Oral compositions should be continued
throughout the course. A few minutes may be profitably used once or twice
each week in having each member of the class stand before the class and
relate briefly some incident which he has witnessed since the last meeting
of the class. Exercises like those on page 53 also will furnish
opportunities for oral work.]--_Relate to the class some personal
incident suggested by one of the following subjects_:--

1. A day with my cousin.
2. Caught in the act.
3. A joke on me.
4. My peculiar mistake.
5. My experience on a farm.
6. My experience in a strange Sunday school.
7. What I saw when I was coming to school.

(In preparation for this exercise, consider the point of your story. What
must you tell first in order to enable the hearers to understand the
point? Can you say anything that will make them want to know what the
point is without really telling them? Can you lead up to it without too
long a delay? Can you stop when the point has been made?)

+8. Theme Writing and Correcting.+--Any written exercise, whether long or
short, is called a theme throughout this book. Just as one learns to skate
by skating, so one learns to write by writing; therefore many themes will
be required. Since the clear expression of thought is one of the essential
characteristics of every theme, theme correction should be primarily
directed to improvement in clearness. The teacher will need to assist in
this correction, but the really valuable part is that which you do for
yourself. After you leave school you will need to decide for yourself what
is right and what is best, and it is essential that you now learn how to
make such decisions.

To aid you in acquiring a habit of self-correction, questions or
suggestions follow the directions for writing each theme. In Theme I you
are to express clearly to others something that is already clear to you.

+Theme I.+-_Write a short theme on one of the subjects that you have used
for an oral composition._

(After writing this theme, read it aloud to yourself. Does it read
smoothly? Have you told what actually happened? Have you told it so that
the hearers will understand you? Have you said what you meant to say?
Consider the introduction. Has the story a point?)

+9. The Conclusion.+--Since the point of a story marks the climax of
interest, it is evident that the conclusion must not be long delayed after
the point has been reached. If the story has been well told, the point
marks the natural conclusion, and a sentence or two will serve to bring
the story to a satisfactory end. If a suitable ending does not suggest
itself, it is better to omit the conclusion altogether than to construct a
forced or flowery one. Notice the conclusion of the incident of the Civil
War related on page 18.

+Theme II.+-_Write a short theme suggested by one of the following
subjects:_--

1. A school picnic.
2. A race.
3. The largest fire I have seen.
4. A skating accident.
5. A queer mistake.
6. An experience with a tramp.

(Correct with reference to meaning and clearness. Consider the
introduction; the point; the conclusion.)

+10. Observation of Actions.+--Many of our most interesting experiences
arise from observing the actions of others. A written description of what
we have observed will gain in interest to the reader, if, in addition to
telling what was done, we give some indication of the way in which it was
done. A list of tools a carpenter uses and the operations he performs
during the half hour we watch him, may be dull and uninteresting; but our
description may have an added value if it shows his manner of working so
that the reader can determine whether the carpenter is an orderly,
methodical, and rapid worker or a mere putterer who is careless,
haphazard, and slow. Two persons will perform similar actions in very
different ways. Our description should be so worded as to show what the
differences are.

+Theme III.+--_Write a theme relating actions._

Suggested subjects:--
1. A mason, blacksmith, painter, or other mechanic at work.
2. How my neighbor mows his lawn.
3. What a man does when his automobile breaks down.
4. Describe the actions of a cat, dog, rabbit, squirrel, or other
animal.
5. Watch the push-cart man a half-hour and report what he did.

(Have you told exactly what was done? Can you by the choice of suitable
words show more plainly the way in which it was done? Does this theme need
to have an introduction? A point? A conclusion?)

+11. Selection of Details.+--You are at present concerned with telling
events that actually happen; but this does not mean that you need to
include everything that occurs. If you wish to tell a friend about some
interesting or exciting incident at a picnic, he will not care to hear
everything that took place during the day. He may listen politely to a
statement of what train you took and what you had in your lunch basket,
but he will be little interested in such details. In order to maintain
interest, the point of your story must not be too long delayed. Brevity is
desirable, and details that bear little relation to the main point, and
that do not prepare the listener to understand and appreciate this point,
are better omitted.

+Theme IV.+--_Write about something that you have done. Use any of the
following subjects, or one suggested by them:_--

1. My first hunt.
2. Why I was tardy.
3. My first fishing trip.
4. My narrow escape.
5. A runaway.
6. What I did last Saturday.

(Read the theme aloud to yourself. Does it read smoothly? Have you said
what you meant to say? Have you expressed it clearly? Consider the
introduction; the point; the conclusion. Reject unnecessary details.)

+12. Order of Events.+--The order in which events occur will assist in
establishing the order in which to relate them. If you are telling about
only one person, you can follow the time order of the events as they
actually happened; but if you are telling about two or more persons who
were doing different things at the same time, you will need to tell first
what one did and then what another did. You must, however, make it clear
to the reader that, though you have told one event after the other, they
really happened at the same time.

In the selection below notice how the italicized portions indicate the
relation in time that the different events bear to one another.

At the beach yesterday a fat woman and her three children caused a great
commotion. They had rigged themselves out in hired suits which might be
described as an average fit, for that of the mother was as much too small
as those of the children were too large. They trotted gingerly out into
the surf, wholly unconscious that the crowd of beach loungers had, for the
time, turned their attention from each other to the quartet in the water.
By degrees the four worked out farther and farther until a wave larger
than usual washed the smallest child entirely off his feet, and caused the
mother to scream lustily for help. The people on the beach started up, and
two or three men hastened to the rescue, but their progress was impeded by
the crowd of frightened girls and women _who were scrambling and splashing
towards the shore_. The mother's frantic efforts to reach the little boy
were rendered ineffectual by the two girls, _who at the moment of the
first alarm had been strangled_ by the salt water and _were now clinging_
desperately to her arms and _attempting_ to climb up to her shoulders.
_Meanwhile_, the lifeboat man was rowing rapidly towards the scene, but it
seemed to the onlookers _who had rushed to the platform railing_ that he
would never arrive. _At the same time_ a young man, _who had started from
the diving raft some time before_, was swimming towards shore with
powerful strokes. He _now_ reached the spot, caught hold of the boy, and
lifted him into the lifeboat, which had _at last_ arrived.

Such expressions as _meanwhile, in the meantime, during, at last, while_,
etc., are regularly used to denote the kind of time relations now under
discussion. They should be used when they avoid confusion, but often a
direct transition from one set of actions to another can be made without
their use. Notice also the use of the relative clause to indicate time
relations.

+Theme V.+-_Write a short theme, using some one of the subjects named
under the preceding themes or one suggested by them. Select one which you
have not already used._

(Have you told enough to enable the reader to follow easily the thread of
the story and to understand what you meant to tell? If your theme is
concerned with more than one set of activities, have you made the
transition from one to another in such a way as to be clear to the reader?
Have you expressed the transitions with the proper time relations? What
other questions should you ask yourself while correcting this theme?)

SUMMARY

1. There is a pleasure to be derived from the expression of ideas.

2. There are three sources of ideas: experience, imagination, language.

3. Ideas gained from experience may be advantageously used for
composition purposes because--
_a._ They are interesting.
_b._ They are your own.
_c._ They are likely to be clear and definite.
_d._ They offer free choice of language.

4. The two essentials of expression are--
_a._ To say what you mean.
_b._ To say it clearly.
5. A story should be told so as to arouse and maintain interest.
Therefore,--
_a._ The introduction usually tells when, where, who, and why.
_b._ Every story worth telling has a point.
_c._ Only such details are included as are essential to the
development
of the point.
_d._ The conclusion is brief. The story comes to an end shortly
after the point is told.

6. Care must be taken to indicate the time order, especially when two or
more events occur at the same time.

7. The correction of one's own theme is the most valuable form of
correction.

II. EXPRESSION OF IDEAS FURNISHED BY IMAGINATION

+13. Relation of Imagination to Experience.+--All ideas are based upon and
spring from experience, and the imagination merely places them in new
combinations. For the purpose of this book, however, it is convenient to
distinguish those themes that relate real events as they actually occurred
from those themes that relate events that did not happen. That body of
writing which we call literature is largely composed of works of an
imaginative character, and for this reason it has sometimes been
carelessly assumed that in order to write one must be possessed of an
excellent imagination. Such an assumption loses sight of the fact that
imaginative writings cover but one small part of the whole field. The
production of literature is the business of a few, while every one has
occasion every day to express ideas. It is evident that by far the greater
part of the ideas we are called upon to express do not require the use of
the imagination, but exercises in writing themes of an imaginative
character are given here because there is pleasure in writing such themes
and because practice in writing them will aid us in stating clearly and
effectively the many ideas arising from our daily experiences.

+14. Advantages and Disadvantages of Imaginative Theme Writing.+--Ideas
furnished by the imagination are no less your own than are those furnished
by experience, and the same freedom in the choice of language prevails.
Such ideas are, however, not likely to be so clear and definite. At the
time of their occurrence they do not make so deep and vital an impression
upon you. If not recorded as they occur, they can seldom be recalled in
the original form. Even though you attempt to write these imaginary ideas
as you think them, you can and do change and modify them as you go along.
This lack of clearness and permanent form, while it seems to give greater
freedom, carries with it disadvantages. In the first place the ideas are
less likely to be worth recording, and in the second place it is more
difficult to give them a unity and directness of statement that will hold
the attention and interest of the reader until the chief point is reached.

+15. Probability.+--Not everything that the imagination may furnish is
equally worth expressing. If you choose to write about something for which
imagination supplies the ideas, you may create for yourself such ideas as
you wish. Their order of occurrence and their time and place are not
determined by outward events, but solely by the mind itself. The events
are no longer real and actual, but may be changed and rearranged without
limit. An imaginative series of events may conform closely to the real and
probable, or it may be manifestly improbable. Which will be of greater
interest will depend upon the reader, but it will be found that the story
which comes nearest to reality is most satisfactory. In relating fairy
tales we confessedly attempt to tell events not possible in the real
world, but in relating tales of real life, however imaginary, we should
tell the events so that everything seems both possible and probable. An
imaginative story, in which the persons seem to be real persons who do and
say the things that real persons do and say, will be found much more
satisfactory than a story that depends for its outcome on something
manifestly impossible. He who really does the best in imaginative writing
is the one who has most closely observed the real events of everyday life,
and states his imaginary events so that they seem real.

+Theme VI.+--_Write a short theme, using one of the subjects below. You
need not tell something that actually happened, but what you tell should
be so told that your readers will think it might have happened._

1. A trip in a sailboat.
2. The travels of a penny.
3. How I was lost.
4. A cat's account of a mouse hunt.
5. The mouse's account of the same hunt.
6. My experience with a burglar.
7. The burglar's story.

+16. Euphony.+--Besides clearness in a composition there are other
desirable qualities. To one of these, various names have been applied, as
"euphony," "ease," "elegance," "beauty," etc. Of two selections equally
clear in meaning one may be more pleasing than the other. One may seem
harsh and rough, while the other flows along with a satisfying ease and
smoothness. If the thought that is in our mind fails to clothe itself in
suitable language and appropriate figures, we can do little by conscious
effort toward improving the beauty of the language; but by avoiding choppy
sentences and inharmonious combinations of words and phrases, we may
remove from our compositions much that is harsh and rough. That quality
which we call ease or euphony is better detected by the ear than by the
eye, and for this reason it has been suggested that you read each theme
aloud to yourself before presenting it to the class. Such a reading will
assist you to determine whether you have made your meaning clear and to
eliminate some of the more disagreeable combinations.

+17. Variety.+--Of the many elements which affect the euphony of a theme
none is more essential than variety. The constant repetition of the same
thing grows monotonous and distasteful, while a pleasing variety maintains
interest and improves the story. For the sake of this variety we avoid the
continual use of the same words and phrases, substituting synonyms and
equivalent expressions if we have need to repeat the same idea many times.

Most children begin every sentence of a story with "and," or perhaps it is
better to say that they conclude many sentences with "and-uh," leaving the
thought in suspense while they are trying to think of what to say next.
High school pupils are not wholly free from this habit, and it is
sometimes retained in their written work. This excessive use of _and_
needs to be corrected. An examination of our language habits will show
that nearly every one has one or more words which he uses to excess. A
professor of rhetoric, after years of correcting others, discovered by
underscoring the word _that_ each time it occurred in his own writing that
he was using it twice as often as necessary. _Got_ is one of the words
used too frequently, and often incorrectly.

EXERCISES

1. In the following selection notice how each sentence begins. Compare it
with one of your own themes.

I was witness to events of a less peaceful character. One day when I went
out to my woodpile, or rather my pile of stumps, I observed two large
ants, the one red, and the other much larger, nearly half an inch long,
and black, fiercely contending with each other. Having once got hold, they
never let go, but struggled and wrestled and rolled on the chips
incessantly. Looking farther, I was surprised to find that the chips were
covered with such combatants; that it was not a _duellum_, but a
_bellum_,--a war between two races of ants, the red always pitted against
the black, and frequently two red ones to one black. The legions of these
Myrmidons covered all the hills and vales in my woodyard, and the ground
was already strewn with the dead and the dying, both red and black.

It was the only battle which I have ever witnessed--the only battlefield I
ever trod while the battle was raging.... On every side they were engaged
in deadly combat, yet without any noise that I could hear, and human
soldiers never fought so resolutely.--Thoreau.

2. Examine one of your own themes. If some word occurs frequently,
underscore it each time, and then substitute words or expressions for it
in as many places as you can. If necessary, reconstruct the sentences so
as to avoid using the word in some cases. Notice how these substitutions
give a variety to your expression and improve the euphony of your
composition.

Theme VII.--_Write a short story suggested by one of the following
subjects:_--

1. The trout's revenge.
2. A sparrow's mistake.
3. A fortunate shot.
4. The freshman and the professor.
5. What the bookcase thought about it.

(Correct with reference to meaning and clearness. Cross out unnecessary
_ands_. Consider the beginnings of the sentences. Can you improve the
euphony by a different choice of words?)

18. Sentence Length.--Euphony is aided by securing a variety in the length
of sentences. In endeavoring to avoid the excessive use of _and_, some
pupils obtain results illustrated by the following example:--

Jean passed through the door of the church. He saw a child sitting on one
of the stone steps. She was fast asleep in the midst of the snow. The
child was thinly clad. Her feet, cold as it was, were bare.

A theme composed wholly of such a succession of short sentences is
tedious. Especially when read aloud does its monotony become apparent.
Though the thought in each sentence is complete, the effect is not
satisfactory to the reader, because the thought of the whole does not come
to him as fast as his mind can act. Such an arrangement of sentences might
be satisfactory to young children, because it would agree with their
habits of thought; but as one grows in ability to think more rapidly, he
finds that longer and more complicated sentences best express his thoughts
and are best understood by those for whom he writes. We introduce
sentences of different length and different structure, because they more
clearly express the thought of the whole and state it in a form more in
accordance with the mental activity of the hearer. When we have done this,
we at the same time secure a variety that avoids monotony.

In attempting to avoid a series of short sentences, care should be taken
not to go to the other extreme. Sentences should not be overloaded. Too
many adjectives or participles or subordinate clauses will render the
meaning obscure. The number of phrases and clauses that may safely be
introduced will be determined by the ability of the mind to grasp the
meaning readily and accurately. It is sometimes quite as important to
separate a long sentence into shorter ones as it is to combine short ones
into those of greater length.

Notice in the following selection the different ways in which several
ideas have been brought into the same sentence without rendering the
meaning obscure:--

Loki made his way across a vast desert moorland, and came, after three
days, into the barren hill country and among the rugged mountains of the
South. There an earthquake had split the rocks asunder, and opened dark
and bottomless gorges, and hollowed out many a low-walled cavern, where
the light of day was never seen. Along deep, winding ways, Loki went,
squeezing through narrow crevices, creeping under huge rocks, and gliding
through crooked clefts, until he came at last into a great underground
hall, where his eyes were dazzled by a light that was stronger and
brighter than the day; for on every side were glowing fires, roaring in
wonderful little gorges, and blown by wonderful little bellows.

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